Highly Sensitive People: My Wife Had Emergency Brain Surgery! (Part 2)

Highly Sensitive People: My Wife Had Emergency Brain Surgery! (Part 2)

I’m overwhelmed in a good way! I couldn’t believe all the well wishes, prayers, and encouragement that I received from my social media friends.  My family and I want to thank you! I’m pleased to say that it has helped us personally and has helped in my wife’s healing.

It has indeed been a difficult time. My wife has been progressing, but it’s been a difficult journey. She got her stitches and staples out last week and is healing nicely. We have a physical therapist coming to our home. A occupational therapist has given us suggestions on how we can make our home less “fallproof”. We’re having another person coming in to install railings, guide bars, and whatever else is needed to prevent an accident.

Our daughter has been extremely helpful and supportive in our time of need. She’s made us wonderful “heat and eat” meals that have helped us tremendously! Our relatives, friends, and neighbors have also offered their support.

I’m grateful for my wife’s progress, but I do harbor some resentment for the way the hospital and some doctors have treated us. I’d like to start out on a positive note by saying that the nurses and the different technicians that my wife has seen have been extremely helpful! Thank goodness for all of these dedicated professionals!

I have a big gripe with the hospital and the many miscommunications that took place. I’m also furious with some of the doctors who lacked empathy in communicating with us. Here is a summary of what happened:

  • When we first entered the hospital, the doctor mentioned that he needed to take some blood tests and have a CAT scan taken to rule out the worst case scenarios. I have no problem with that. He further mentioned that my wife could have Parkinson’s Disease, blood on the brain that would need an operation, or a possible stroke. Was this extra information necessary? Why give a diagnosis when you’re not sure what the diagnosis is? My wife and I were scared to death!
  • My wife was scheduled to have surgery at 5:00 pm. They moved it up to 3:00 pm. With little notice,  my daughter and I rushed to the hospital to see her before her surgery. We were relieved to get there on time to see her. She was in a holding room for surgical patients before surgery. It was a small room and was extremely cold. As it turned out, she didn’t have surgery until 8:00 pm! Was it necessary to have us in this room for 5 hours?
  • When it was time for my wife’s surgery, the doctor and his assistant came in to see us. I asked them where my daughter and I could wait. They told us they weren’t sure because of the COVID-19 concerns. I asked them what should we do? We wanted to be there when the surgery was finished. They told us to wait in the same small cold room and told us not to leave. They would call us. I made sure that the doctor and his assistant had my cell phone number. They assured us that they would call us.
  • After 6 hours there was no call! My daughter and I were concerned that something went wrong. We needed to know what was going on! There wasn’t a single person on the entire floor to ask. I started to make random calls and found out that she was operated on 4 hours before and was in intensive care and doing well. We were able to talk to her. I’ll mention more about this in a future post. Was it asking too much for someone in the hospital to notify us when my wife’s surgery was completed?

This experience has been more stressful than it needed to be. Is this normal communication in the healthcare industry? I’m interested in any thoughts or comments that you have.

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This Post Has 4 Comments

  1. Charlene Karwatsky

    It is the norm now
    It is impossible to navigate without frustration these days

  2. Cliff Harwin

    Hi Charlene,

    Unfortunately, I think you’re right!

    It’s important that we be our own advocates! We have to keep everyone on their toes!

  3. CNJ

    I’m so glad our thoughts and prayers helped. I’m so sorry that your family went through those dreadful experiences at the hospital, though.

    Hospitals need to have more empathy and definitely more accommodating of HSPs. I hate traditional hospitals.

    1. Cliff Harwin

      Hi CNJ,

      Thank you for your comments!

      I hope that ALL of us can stay out of the hospital.

      Let’s stay as healthy as we can for as long as we can!

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