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Do you get in your own way?
Photo by FeiFei Peng

Do you get in your own way?

Do you get in your own way? If so, you might be your own worst enemy. I’m guilty of wanting to do something and then talking myself out of it by coming up with a million reasons as to why it’s a bad idea. Do you sabotage yourself? If so, why so? The answer lies in one word….FEAR!

Our fearful thoughts and negative beliefs act as a barrier to getting what we want. Whether consciously or unconsciously, we sabotage our own opportunities. Below are some signs of self-sabotage:

  • Procrastination. Putting things off is a way to set yourself up for failure. There’s no way you can do a good job if you leave things for the last-minute. You may justify your behavior by claiming that you were overwhelmed, which may also be true. To prevent procrastination and feelings of overwhelm, break up the task into small parts, and commit to doing a little bit at a time.
  • Fear of feedback. No HSP wants to set themselves up to be judged…or even worse, criticized! I know I don’t, but feedback is to be expected whenever you put yourself out there.  The feedback may be good or bad, but you can always choose your response. Responding negatively to criticism may seem like it’ll protect your ego, but it’ll only further erode your self-confidence. HSPs will to take criticism to heart, no matter what! Being able to accept feedback takes courage, but it can help you improve, which will likely reduce future criticism.
  • Denial. This means that you’re not facing reality. Being honest about a situation will put you on a realistic track to cope with it.
  • Obsessing but failing to act. Everyone obsesses. It’s human nature to do so. It becomes destructive when you waste so much time and energy mulling over a problem that you are unable to do anything about it. Taking action puts you in control and will alleviate some of your anxiety.

Do you get in your own way? If so, how so? I’m interested in any thoughts or comments that you have.

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Wow. It’s funny you write this. I need change
    In my life. But I have been procrastinating from
    Fear I’m full of what ifs. I work for a lady that
    Brings me down every day. I’ve been there for
    Ten years. I went to unemployment and got information
    About a course. Going back to school and learning a
    New trade. I’m telling myself I’m not smart enough
    Because my high school was a trade school. And what if I
    Can’t find a job due to lack of self confidence How would
    I pay backyard students loans. How will I pay my rent while
    I’m in school. What if I fail my course. The list goes on.
    So I just stay at my job looking after a woman that doesn’t like
    Me. And that is so toxic for me. Fear of the unknown
    And fear of not being able to pay my bills

    1. Hi Debra,

      You’re smarter than you give yourself credit for. Stop the negative self-talk. It doesn’t serve you.

      Why can’t you go to school while you’re working at your current job? Check the trade schools in your area. I’m sure they have flexible schedules for working people who want to upgrade their skills.

      Learning a new skill will do wonders for your self-confidence. Just focus on learning as much as you can. Stop the needless worry about negative things that probably won’t happen.

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