Life is difficult sometimes!

Life is difficult sometimes! It’s been a little over three weeks since my mother passed away. It seems much longer. Many thoughts, good and bad, creep into my mind. I’ve been doing what I need to do, but I still feel that I’m in a daze.

My emotions are running all over the place. Sadness, grief, regret, and family issues keep bubbling up. I have periods of crying that seem to just come up. I still can’t believe my mother is gone. I called my mother everyday. It seems strange to not do that anymore. My life has changed and I’m having a difficult time dealing with it.

I’m overwhelmed with the many things that I have to do. I can honestly say that I’m doing the best that I can. I’m doing everything that needs to be done with my mother’s estate. Everything involved with it takes time and costs money!

I ask for help when I need it. I’ve gotten support from my wife, daughter, other family members, and friends. I really appreciate the support and heartfelt sentiments from the HSP community. I’m not ashamed to admit that I cried when I read ALL of your comments! I’m overwhelmed, in a good way, and grateful to all of you who took the time to express your thoughts and support.

I get very impatient with myself when I’m not moving faster to get things done. I naturally have a great sense of urgency to get things done fast. It’s very frustrating when others don’t share my sense of urgency. Unfortunately, this makes me hard to be around.

I’m learning that I need to not push myself and others as hard as I do. Things need to be done, but not at the expense of making myself and others crazy. Balance is definitely the key to sanity and productivity.

Life is indeed difficult sometimes! I realize that this phase of my life is difficult, but time will make things easier. I choose to learn from this experience and become a stronger person who will better appreciate the good times in my life.

I’m going to share more of my thoughts about my grieving process in my upcoming newsletter. I’m having a difficult time writing and getting my thoughts together, so it’s taking me longer to complete it.

Again, thank you for your support! As always, I’m interested in any thoughts or comments that you have.

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Such a tender and emotional description of what you are going through. Just remember that it is not easy. And being in charge of an estate is time consuming and very hard too. It took almost a year to totally close out an estate in NJ of a close family member. The red tape does not care about feelings. Your mother was lucky to have you close by. It’s too soon to even begin to feel better so indulge yourself.

    1. Thank you Myrna. You’re right, the whole process of handling grief and an estate isn’t easy.

      Each part of the process is difficult. I get very emotional when I go through her things, personal papers, and handling her financial affairs. I sold her car, got a real estate agent, and am in the process of cleaning out her house. So much to do!

      Would you believe that she still lived in Madison Park? Many memories there! My mother was still living in the same house since 1955! She was very self-sufficient till the day she died. She still drove, handled her own financial affairs, and did her own shopping. On the day she died, she went to the beauty shop, Shop Rite, and went to Walmart!

      Thanks again Myrna for your support!

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