Are you self-conscious?

For as long as I remember, I’ve always been a highly sensitive person (HSP). Always self-conscious about my appearance, I worried about what other people thought of me. Since I was tall for my age, people frequently teased me about this.

While it’s normal for young people to feel awkward and self-conscious, HSPs are like “human sponges.” We react to, and take in everything around us. Feelings are magnified. We have certain intuition or strong feelings about everything and everyone. We feel we’re different from others.

In reality, we’re not much different than anyone else. Everyone has a certain degree of insecurities about themselves. The only difference is that others brush this initial awkwardness aside and are not affected by it. Being highly sensitive and self-conscious shouldn’t be used as an excuse for not fully participating in the joys of life.

Some characteristics of a self-conscious person include:

• A lack of self-confidence.
• Feeling ill at ease in the presence of strangers.
• Feeling at a loss for words in conversations.
• A fear of being humiliated.

Self-consciousness is linked to feelings of inferiority. The idea of not being “good enough” is a self-induced habit. It can have a disastrous effect on our social and business lives. A hesitation to make new friends and the lack of initiative to try new things will result. Having a distorted perception about ourselves and others stops us from leading our happiest and most productive lives.

I have found it helpful to go to adult education classes. The classes provide a “safe” environment to meet like minded people and to learn about different subjects. This type of activity greatly enhances my self-esteem when I face my fears and learn new things.

Go to events that are linked to your interests. The more you go out, the better you’ll feel about your ability to be around others. When you talk to other people, focus on what a person is saying and ask questions about them. You will never be at a loss for words when you take this approach. When you encourage people to talk about themselves, they will think that you’re a great conversationalist!

Take the time to work on your personal appearance. Your grooming, the way you dress and the way you carry yourself, show others how you feel about yourself. When you feel good about yourself, others will treat you accordingly. Also, when you have an increased feeling of self-esteem, you will not care what others think about you.

The people you come in contact with are more focused on themselves than with you. We self-conscious people are abnormally concerned about our perceived shortcomings. Isn’t it comforting to know that other people don’t look at us in a negative light? They are only concerned about their own insecurities!

Don’t allow yourself to be paralyzed by self-consciousness. It’s too easy to cling to our hurtful past experiences and bad habits. We have the responsibility of building our best selves from what we have. I repeat…there’s nothing wrong or different about us. Being a self-conscious person is a great way to be. We truly understand how hurtful people can be to each other. We would never purposely hurt others. Who wouldn’t like us and want to be our friend?

Are you self-conscious? I’m interested in any thoughts or comments that you have.

This Post Has 5 Comments

  1. Thank u very much ….i really wept after reading this, because I myself is self conscious…these characteristics I found im my self now i am facing these things…i found myself different from others. Most of times I don’t have words to express or describe …

    Thank you ..

    I needed more help

  2. So true 🙂 Your words totally echo my feelings and fears. It gave me a fresh perspective about my self consciousness and how to overcome it. So simply and subtly. Thank you 🙂

  3. Self-conscious people see the little subtleties that most conscious people don’t, and they also empathize more with others, the ability to put themselves in the other person’s shoes and see it their way. The conscious people just either don’t or are not willing to do this, they don’t give a damn what people think of them.

  4. This is exactly me. I’m a nurse and often make presentations… Some seconds into my speech I begin to have shaky hands, my voice begins to fade and I begin to think of what others think of my voice, my clothes, my speech intact, everything!!! I have an extremely limited number of friends and stick to my comfort zone. I hate it! I want to be free and not have to think before I act.. It’s eating me up!!! What’s d solution? Anyone improved on their self consciousness?

    1. Hello Tinu,

      Thanks for being courageous to share this in public.
      Sincerely, most people face this dilemma at one point or the other in their lives.
      I am currently facing such too. My advice to you is to try an focus on what you are trying to present. Do not focus on what people are thinking because you can not control it. Focus on yourself, try improve yourself and am sure you will be fine.

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